Monday, April 24, 2006

The beginning of Child development starts from your decision in choosing Who's your life partner

We had a case conference discussing on the amalgamation of theories in child development (operationally defined as 0 - 7 years of age). Yes, today, the ghosts of Sigmund Freud, Piaget, Bowlby and Kohlberg came alive, right in Minda (the name of our meeting room). To spice things up, the discussion was centred around the Islamic teachings of child development as espoused in the revelation.

"The beginning of Child Development starts from your decision in choosing WHO's your life partner" , brother (we call our boss 'brother') begun his part of the research.

THAT woke me up! (u see, it was 2pm, and i skipped lunch preparing Kohlberg theory and rushing Saff deadlines)

Wow! Brother! What happened to our operationally defined age (0 - 7 years)???

Often times we focus on the development of our child's physical ("uu.. she's wearing 'L' size pampers now"), social ("she smiles whenever she sees me"), emotional ("she doesnt like it if i take away her blankie") and cognitive ("she can now say 'mama'!") development. Little do we pay attention to the little tinkle bell's tauhidic development.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen....
ALL aspects of development begin at the moment when we choose our life partner.

The little tyke is welcomed with the sweet (i rather husky) voice of his/her father's adzan and iqamah.

That is the beginning of his/her Tauhidic education.

The child is born in FITRAH.

No... not tabula rasa (Latin word coined by John Locke, which is the notion that individual human beings are born "blank", and that their identity is defined entirely by their experiences and sensory perceptions of the outside world)

A child is born not as a blank sheet of cloth, or paper, but with the potential of being GOOD. And GOOD is definitely not a blank.

The interesting discovery didnt end there. Critical analysis of theories and its practicality has always interest my grey cells.

Dun just throw away Freud, Bowlby, Kohlberg, Erikson, Piaget and the likes.
They created this knowledge with empirical evidence, with rigorous experimentations and testings.
Islam has always acknowledge knowledge created from our intelligence.

But as Muslims, be mindful of our limitations. The limitation of our intelligence.

Revelation has always been the source of all knowledge. Return to it.
And strengthen the Freud, Bowlby, Kohlberg and etc, with the Islamic perspective, with the entrance of eeman.

Brother,
i wish to argue your initial statement.
Indeed, the beginning of Child development starts from my decision being the very person i aspire to be

Ladies..
Your motherly tasks begin NOW...with yourself.

Humaira...
NOW.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

... and the funny thing is, i didnt wanna wake up from that dream...

It took her a while to reach out that phone. The sun was shining bright... rays zooming in through her small windows, brightening her little room.

It was a fine morning, she whispered.

Should i spoil it?

Emily reached out for that cellphone nevertheless. Scrolled down to find his number and dialed.

Ringing tone....
Ringing tone...

"Yeah?", the husky voice on the other line

"Hey! Morning! How are you? I just called to say that i met you in my dreams, not in the R(A) or M-18 kinda dream, but, i just saw you in my dream and you know what? The funny thing is that i didnt wanna wake up from that dream. I miss you so much that meeting you and seeing you in my dream makes my night. Not that i'm a psycho, or anything, or not that i tried, its been a year that we've broken up. I do, i did try but in every dates i've been to i kept bumping into your friends, and that reminded me of the fun things we did while we were together and that make me miss you so much, but i know this is not a good time, especially with exams coming up, i'm sorry, its been quite selfish of me, i probably should say good bye now", breathless Emily stopped.

"Hey.... errrr.."

"Its ok. You dont have to say anything. This is probably my fault. I apologise. Please get back to your books" Emily jumped in.

And she hung up.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

The dissonance continues

Am gearing up to inaurgurally start typing my essay. Sheesh! I'm still in a daze on what topic to study on.

For those kind souls who may be worrying about my studies (i thank you for doing that job for me *smilez*), i believe you deserve to know how well, or badly, i've done. Here goes.

I'm in the 18th week of my first semester, and i still have yet to memorise my module code. Hence my decision to give up memorising, as the more important thing is to remember what subjects i'm learning. Hence, my achievement this 18th week --> recalling my module titles =D

History 1010 - Understanding the seerah from the journey of Prophet Muhammad to the reignship of Umaiyah.

Re-Learning seerah has been refreshing, as i forgot most of it. So the class, despite being boring, i benefitted by recalling the past facts memorised or cramped somewhere in my brain system for the purpose of the examinations in Alsagoff eons ago.

Thus far, i've submitted 2 assignments, and i still have one long overdued topic still sitting quietly in my lappie. I have to write about the legitimacy of khulafa' rasyidin. I'm still clueless as how do i measure legitimacy. According to who? the ahli sunnah? the muslim community 1000 years ago???? (go figure why the document is still incomplete in my lappie)

Fiqh Seerah - Understanding the seerah of Rasulullah specifically and understanding its significance and relevance to the current context.

This is the most active module with tests in the middle of every session. If you define success as being the bottomline number, here's the list of the 'bottomline' numbers:

Test 1: 8.5 / 10
Test 2: 7.5 / 10
(screwed up as i mis-interpreted the question. Boohoo)
Test 3: 9 /10
Test 4: 9.5 / 10
Test 5: unknown (hoping to get 10 though)

I have a 10-page assignment to hand in, which of course, have yet started.
Am planning to write about the history of Jahiliyah - its roots and continuity in contemporary society. Again... pray for me

Revelation as the Source of Knowledge - Understanding the Qur'an as THE source of knowledge (kinda self explanatory isnt it? but its the hardest, i tell u)


Arrrgghhh!! I NEED to hand in this 10-page essay tonite, if possible. Hence causing a 'still-not-focused anxiety' which lead to MORE anxiety!

I'm inspired to write about knowledge and how the knowledge revolution in our contemporary society has become increasingly value-less, and the implications it has on us as an ummah (that's a mouthful. U can sense my non-focused-ness from that paragraph). So, since i'm supposed to present about Kohlberg theory on Moral development in Children's development at work (Yeah.. our casework discussion meetings have been actively re-activated), might as well i do a comparative study on Kohlberg and what the revelation has taught us (in the spirit of killing birdss (and trees) with one essay).

So... i promise i'll start reading bout kohlberg and Naquib Al-Attas once i'm done updating bout my 'life' (oh gawwwd).

Islamic Worldview - Understanding the Islamic worldview vis-a-vis other worldviews (my fav so far)

This module was my muse! I luv it! Apart from that, i've officially completed my assignments (Hurraaahhhh!!!);

I've done a book review presentation on Sachiko Murata and William C. Chittick's The Vision of Islam (interesting analysing how non-Muslims view Islam and how surprisingly accurate and extensive their research and findings are)

My group has completed our in-depth study on Globalisation and Glocalisation, and Islam's position in this world. Although i'm not so satisfied with my effort in this thesis, at least i've completed it. Less worries.

Oh yeah.. we had a mid-term on the topic: "Islam between Liberalism and Extermism. Discuss in the light of dalil 'aql and naql".
The lecturer was kind enuff to award me 8.5 /10 (alhamdulillah)

-------------------------

That's it!

Exams coming up next week.

Cant wait for it.

Cant wait to end it.

If i may comment on my 'process' of learning this first semester, it has been a FLASH adjustment. Am not truly enjoying it yet coz i didnt put in as much effort and passion as i expected myself to, but, insyaAllah, am getting the hang of it. (I really need to hand in those over-dued assignments)

And oh yeah...

I was selected to be one of the Student Council members.

Innalillaahi wa innaa ilaihi raajiuun.


Humaira
Now now.. its time to get to know that 2 old men

Friday, April 21, 2006

Focused Anxiety

Even if you need to be anxious of your deadlines and tasks, make them focused.
In other words, if you need to be anxious, at least ensure that the anxiey is focused
(haha!)

Geddit?

Something i learnt from SSTI's Outcome Management Course.

I remember debating about the Outcome Management system when i was in my final year in NUS. Back then, NCSS was just 'planning' to establish such system so as to manage the outcome of their fundings (or what they rather call it now... investments)

Now i realise how serious they were.

Outcome Management system talks about client's changing experience vs the 'bottomline' number.
It emphasises lessons learned, both by clients and workers.

We were right during the debate. The process has to be just as important as the numbers.

The system allows both to be reflected.

(Ok. I'm losing my readers now)

The point of blogging this up is to ponder upon the concept of muhasabah that we've learnt.

Imam Ghazali once mentioned about our meta-analysis ability and how it functions in our muhasabah.

The concept of muhasabah does not solely mean we reflect upon our behaviour at the end of an action.

Instead, we have to be able to meta-analytically reflect upon our behaviour while doing it.

Complicated?

According to Ghazali, that was the highest state of muhasabah (incorporating the concept of muraqabah (self monitoring) too, i think)

Very tasawwuf and sufistic.

Yet again... its knowledge.

Applying this concept on Outcome Management System, this process allows us to constantly review our work plan and performance.

So as to attain results and improvement. Just like Khalifah 'Umar said, we have to ensure our today is better than yesterday.

Very Islamic isnt it?

Have i told you how much i love this job?

Have i told you how much i discover my religion via this career?

You have no idea.

No one day is the same.

Had a crisis counselling with a teen today.. something new, as the teen is a volunteer.
Who refused to come home, and instead, came to the centre to seek refuge.

What does this tell us?
What has this taught me?

That we've done a good job such that she prefered coming to the centre rather than staying at home?

How would you feel when a mom said "since my daughter would rather go to you when she's in trouble, let her be. I'm just her mother"?

I feel, i might have done something wrong. I might have also done something good.

Mother realised her position is being challenged --> Mother motivated to win daughter --> Mother 'communicate' with daughter --> if doesnt work, mother seeks help.

At the end of the day... we have to DECIDE on how we look at things.
It is how we position our spectacles, and what kind of lenses we're wearing.

You may agree...
You're welcome to disagree.

Now now... meta-analysing my behaviour at the moment, i'm diagnosting myself as being a dissonant (which may lead to craziness if not curbed from now). Why? because,
my action and my consciousness is not in harmony. How? as i blog, i am aware that i have 3 very important assignments to hand in, and yet, i'm allowing myself to be lured into doing 'lagha' (menial) works.

Meta-meta analysing my thoughts and behaviour at the moment: I am feeling very guilty, thus, i decide that i should press that fullstop button .

Humaira
forced by that one button

Friday, April 07, 2006

The Day I wish i signed up for that Kick Boxing Class

If you work for a living... then why do you work yourself to death?
Something someone shared which tickled me today.

Despite the horrible incident this morning.

Thank you for allowing me to cry.

Thank you for re-framing the way i see things.

Test tomorrow, and i'm talking to Qam about his 16th Birthday and his sweet doctor-to-be girlfriend, and an annoying friend who keep bugging and asking when i'm getting married. Geez... Get a Life!

Had fun talking to the former. Happy B-Dae kiddo!

To the latter, remember the procedure? Number 1: Only ask that question to those who think they've found the one. Number 2: Ask the question ~ When are you getting married? Number 3: Ask the Question ~ Are you SURE???

Gosh.. didnt i teach you anything??

Humaira
The sun is still shining *big smile*

Thursday, April 06, 2006

When the going gets tough, the tough gets going?

Allah help me!

humaira
'there's no entry typed, without you in mind'

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Carpe Diem?? Bahh!

Deeply inspired by my movie-ton yesternight, i started the day at werk shouting (in my heart lar) CARPE DIEM!!! Seize the Day!!!!!

The high energy level dropped suddenly like a stock market graph gone wrong after i tried calling THEM and to get THEM pay for something (cant vommit alot lar.. confidential). It was CRAZIEE.

Carpe Diem? pfffffffft!!

This Carpe Diem thingy... Mr Keating taught me this:
TIS ONLY IN THEIR DREAMS THAT MEN TRULY BE FREE,
'TWAS ALWAYS THUS, AND ALWAYS THUS WILL BE. -KEATING.
No wonder my Carpe Diem didnt work. I wasnt dreaming.

HUH?!?

I need to re-watch Dead Poet Society again tonight.


Sheesh!! To REVISE and understand Mr Keating's lesson again.

Really!!

What? You think i'm rewatching it because of those gorgeous boys, who are endowned with attractive intellectual brain, killer smiles, dazzling blue eyes, and of course... their cute and sexy cheekiness??

Come on...

*grinz*

That too.

Gawwdd!! I have millions other things to do and yet i'm engaging myself with this..this...this menial, insignificant activity of purely enterntainment. Sinful!!

I have a test this weekend, and i know i have to do better this time, as i pretty confident i screwed up the previous one. Total crap. If the lecturer gave me a 0, i totally understand it, as i sux. FULL STOP.

Now now..

Who wants to join me in Dead Person Society ?

humaira
fictionally... ALIVE tho'

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

She doesn't want to be touched

Monday nights are Hospital nights. Kudos to Channel 5 Programming team for bringing us Grey's Anatomy and Scrubs BACK TO BACK. I lurrvee my nights.

I've fallen in love with a FICTIONAL doctor *Droolz* (Oh! Dr M, you still have a place in my heart *giggles*)

Enter Dr Preston Burke of Seattle Grace Hospital.

Dr P enters the room to visit his ex, Christina, gesturing to put his hands on her head, suddenly,

"She doesnt want to be touched", Christina's mom said.

I believe her. Coz Christina is a cold hard b#@$. Before the scene, she just cried buckets, not knowing why she cried (actually its understandable, coz she was dumped, she lost her fallopian tube, and a baby - a miscarriage) and she requested her doctor friends to sedate her. Gosh woman! We cry coz we' re hurt and that's normal lar~ But no... she has to uphold her ego. Oh well... that makes her interesting.. Niwei.. back to the story.

When Dr P heard the mother's warning, he undressed his coat (he was wearing a turtle neck inside and he looks hot in it), and.... guess guess....

he put HIMSELF beside Christina, on the hospital bed, cuddling her like a little child.

Christina kept quiet. And continued crying.

That....

earns its place in my list of most romantic scene (that has to come AFTER Pride and Prejudice Rainy scene tho. No scene can beat that yet)

i went "awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" for the next 10 seconds.

He's the MAN!

He's there... when she doesnt expect him.

And that's sweet.

Now...
he's fictional isnt he?

Humaira

~If i can be fictional too~

Pssst: His real name is Isiah Washington. And yeah... he's married to A wife, and 2 children (Bah!)

Monday, April 03, 2006

Organising Self

Need to start some 'book keeping' system for my vcd collections. Dun mind me using this space. Its the only space accessible =D Tak hilang nyer, insyaAllah.


Scarlet Box

Madagascar -Cartoon
Dodgeball : A True Underdog Story -Comedy
Shutter -Horror
In Good Company -Comedy
Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone -Comedy
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy -Comedy
Finding Neverland (one cd missing) -Literature
Batman begins -Drama
Conderella Man -Literature
Crash -Drama
Shakespeare in Love -Literature
Children of Heaven -Drama
Chocolat -Literature
Kingdom of Heaven -Epic
The Matrix Literature
March of the Penguins -Drama-Documentary (French)
Harold & Kumar go to White Castle -Comedy
Million Dollar Baby -Drama
Hotel Rwanda History
Robots Cartoon

More later...

Sunday, April 02, 2006

The Constant State of going Nowhere

Dedicated to my muse: BIRKH

I got myself new lenses

not as dirty as the previous
i see greener grass...
blue-r skies...
redder apples...
i smile as i marvel at these wonders

No more blur no more confusion
No more feeling at the edge of depression

It's ok if i'm nowhere
as long as i have this new eye wear

Move on... if you wish to
i'll stay here, praying for you.
With these new lenses i wear,
i find meaning here i swear.

Do i?

Or do i wish to follow?
to avoid this hollow?
JUST to avoid this hollow??

As i think with these new lenses,
i know that time passes,
let it be let it be...

I like the green grass here,
the blue sky here,
the red apples here.

It's ok if I'm nowhere
as long as i have this new eye wear