Had a good frustrating discussion..and we got by it.. alhamdulillah...
Now i'm de-briefing myself (That's how to better myself isnt it?)
I realise tat, i've been feeling v. comfortable in my agency's werking culture. I felt so safe to make mistakes, i felt so loved that i believed they haf done good job in giving advice wenever i err... this is wat i describe as... menegur dengan hikmah. The feeling is Wonderful.
How can this feeling felt only in the agency? Is it the skills that these colleagues of mine posses? Or is it the level of respect we haf towards each other? Is it the level of acceptance of each other and acknowledging that we're all human beings after all? Is it the level of expectations towards each other that is just nice and realistic?
I'm not sure... but i wanna be them.
I wanna be someone who can give advice to another with the effect that he/she feels safe to talk to me again.
Sadly.. i didnt feel safe at the end of the DP meeting. I feel blamed. I feel guilty. Hmmm.... funny....
Maybe i should mind my own business... talk less.. listen more... BUT.. I WAS listening more.. that's how the comments got by... I'm worried about the project. I dun want to overtire everyone.. more can be done by doing less. More can be achieved by doing less and effectively. More can be saved by spending less and efficiently. The syura has been decided... and i accepted it. Thus, i brought out my CONCERNS... its my right. Why do i feel guilty of doing what's right???? Arrrggg!!! The purpose of challenging an idea is to test how robust the idea is! Isnt that purposeful enuff?????
Lots of organisation process get stuck when these details are not thought of. Moi juz trying to apply watever tips moi haf learnt.. that's all.... Why do i have to defend this??????
Enuff bout that.
Message to self: DO NOT BE BOGGED DOWN WITH THIS. THIS IS INDEED A CHALLENGE TO SELF. ASSERT SELF'S VALUES, BELIEFS AND PRINCIPLE. BE OPEN MINDED. ELSE, tawakkal 'alal laah. HE is the Almighty and All Knowing.
Case closed. Will open wenever deem need to.
Jude's bz revising for exams. Jude's stressed
. Pity Jude...
I'm having 2 difficult cases tomorrow; drug and drug. I need rest and sleep. But i cant help crying
Allah... help me!!!!
On a lighter note.. (i just feel i need to record this) Jude went all the way back to home (from hostel) just to get a v-cam for me (i need it for the presentation) Thanks Jude. I realllllllyyy appreciate it!! haha... hope i can make it up to you some day....
Things at werk? hmmm... getting better... my in-tray is decreasing by the day. Will be increased after tomorrow's cases i think.
Heyy!! I just realised something!! I havent had dinner today!! But then.. its already past 12 midnight now.. i promised myself not to eat after 8pm. But then.. few sticks of Amicelli wont hurt ryte? Will brush teeth after this! Promise!!!
Singapore idol update
: OLINDA'S OUT!!! Can u believe that??? These rich Ah Bengs and Ah Lians actually voted for Sylvester!!! Goshh!!! Lets 'predict' who'll win the first S.I... i'll say... Sylvester. Face it: He's rich. He's fan base is rich. He's CHINESE. He'll just win the popularity vote. 'Fix it': Singaporeans to start opne their ears and eyes and standard and start voting for talent and x factor.. however subjective it may be.
Ok... i need to conserve energy for tomorrow's case. Goshhh!!! Allah!!! Please guide me for tomorrow's sessions with the 2 sets of families. Please guide them to your correct path. Please make easy their journey to the straight path. Allah... You are the All Knowing and Most Merciful.
The Episode that is too emotional,
humaira
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